That time I didn’t cry during Crossfit “Nancy”

If you have been following my blog for any amount of time, you may know that I have had a history of crying during Crossfit. As much as I hate to admit it, there were plenty more times than just those I confessed on the blog like here, here, here, oh, and here’s another. And one more, the most recent (and the last time ever to cry)..

Two undocumented instances were benchmark WODs that I did last year, Nancy and Karen. Today, let’s reflect on “Nancy.”

May 2, 2013: Nancy – First Time

I first did Nancy during my Crossfit infancy where I was still naive, had little expectations of myself, and just wanted to finish the workouts. I had only been doing Crossfit about 4 months, so opted to use just the girl-bar, since my confidence and stability with weight overhead was still being molded. I have no other notes on this one, so not too sure how it felt, but my guess is terrible. 🙂

20:15 scaled

Jul 12, 2013: Nancy- Take Two

I am not sure when it exactly hit, but some time around my 6-month mark of Crossfit, I was fully drunk on Crossfit and all of a sudden demanded more of myself, comparing myself to others and becoming easily frustrated when workouts didn’t go my way. I wrote a two-part post on Crossfit being an emotional roller coaster, first with an experience with “The Seven” and another with “Angie.” So when faced with an opportunity to redo this workout, paired with putting effort towards training for my first-and-last half marathon, I set the bar pretty high.

I distinctly remember this WOD during a Crossfit Endurance class last summer. I had written in my notes that I started off at 55#, then dropped to 45# halfway during the WOD. I can recall tears of frustration and anxiety during the WOD. I had been running so much more, yet it wasn’t reflecting in this WOD. My legs were on fire and the longer the WOD went on and as I watched people finish before me, the worse my anxiety got, and it was all negativity. Do you know how hard it is to WOD with tears? I’m a pro.

20:04 scaled.

September 30, 2014: Nancy – With a New Attitude

When I heard that I needed to do Nancy this week for a baseline measure for a competition training class, I flashed back to the negative experiences I had in the past and how demoralizing it was the last time I did it. Even though it is more than a year later, I still struggle in WODs with running, especially since my focus now has been mostly weightlifting and not running at all like I was last year. I know that my OHS are much stronger (um, hello recent PR), but doing squats for reps is difficult for me and my baby glutes (yep, they’re just all for show).

But since I started following The Outlaw Way, my attitude towards WODs has changed. I approach them with less expectations, but more commitment and drive. I want to be better, and no matter how much suck is in a workout, I’m going to do it. Like I tried to convince myself during the Open: I can do hard things. I have done worse WODs, and I have done this WOD before.

Doing this WOD was not easy, but the focus was on doing it RX and not on watching the clock. I finished the WOD faster than any other time, but also did it RX. And with no tears.

19:15 RX.

Sometimes it is hard to measure progress day by day in Crossfit, and sometimes we do get so emotionally invested that when things don’t go our way, it is extremely difficult mentally and physically. But sometimes we need to take a step back, celebrate our small gains, and know that we are getting stronger everyday, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Always aim for progress, not perfection.

Your turn..
What was the last benchmark workout that you made significant progress on?
Are you an emotional worker-outer? 
How has Crossfit changed you mentally?